We all deal with stuff. This can aptly be described as suffering.
When we are in the thick of our own suffering, it seems as if the world is closing in on us, and the capacity to deviate from the emotions of those issues may seem intolerable.
However, there is a refuge, a safety net, and new ways to comprehend our problems when it seems we have no way out.
I feel as if I’ve gone through hell and back these past few years. I’m still here, smiling, living, and embracing every single second I have on this giant spinning rock.
I hope the reasons presented, offer you some level of peace and tickle a funny bone.
No matter what you’re going through, you’re going to be okay, because if you’re reading this, then you’re alive, which is an excellent segue into my first point.
Enjoy!
Everyone Is Going to Die
Think about the human experience. It’s such a peculiar predicament we are all in. We come into the world without knowing why, build relationships with others, forge strong bonds with those close, maybe make a few enemies, watch people go away, eat lots of pie, go fishing, and then we die.
I will die.
You will die.
With the exception of Elvis, we don’t know if reincarnation is a certainty. And this is coming from a part-time, when it’s convenient, pious Indian.
The fact of death is clear. We all know it will come. Anything that holds beauty is beautiful because it’s mortal. We appreciate those we love because they will not be here forever.
Death can also be a way to forgive others quickly. A few weeks ago my wife had an unsettling experience with a disgruntled grocery store employee. I told her, don’t worry, she will die one day.
Take it easy, I don’t wish death upon anyone, but knowing everyone and everything is in some sense doomed, quickly dissolves the need to waste energy on anger.
Our energies are far better suited to consume pie or perhaps an old batch of Basil Hayden. It’s a Friends reference for those not familiar.
We All Suffer
The celebrities we adore. They suffer.
The friends and family that post awesome social media pics of their beautiful lives. They suffer.
My dog Meli…no, he doesn’t suffer. He eats rib-eye for dinner and drinks raw milk. He’s a lucky son of a bitch. Pun intended.
The suffering of the human experience is the same for everyone. The actual cause of the suffering may be different, but when you are in the thick of your biggest problems, that feeling of not being able to find freedom from yourself is shared with many people.
We bleed, we cry, and we all need comfort.
Sometimes, it’s comforting knowing that you are not alone.
Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about — Brad Meltzer
None of our lives are picture-perfect.
Deep within the filaments of the social media filters that outline perceived perfection are sadness, heartache, and a yearning to understand what the hell am I doing here.
This brings me to my next point.
No One Has This Game Figured Out
The smartest minds amongst us are in Geneva, Switzerland conducting experiments and firing photons in some ungodly large hydron collider trying to understand the secrets of the universe.
Elon Musk wants to go to Mars.
I really want some cheese curds.
In the course of a day, we have varying degrees of wants, responsibilities, and needs. We are a complicated, simplistic, innocent, intelligent, and stupid species.
Our minds are never directed towards one thing. Many times, we don’t know why we do the things we do.
To some, the game is about serving their families, to others maybe serve a higher belief system. For me, it’s about serving myself pizza. It has to be thin and crispy and everyone should know the rules. Shout out to Prez.
The best we can do is bring meaning and purpose to what we think this game is about.
No one really knows for certain, and that’s ok.
Most People Don’t Care About You
Yeah, I said it.
Most people don’t care.
I do. Why else would I even take the time to write you this masterpiece?
On any given day you see many people. All with their own desires and problems.
You are just a gust of wind in their ever so important lives.
We are all selfish to some extent. I would argue, that there aren’t 7.7 billion people in the world. Instead, there are 7.7 billion points of view on earth.
Each of us has our own world. We have a biased lens that stems from our preconceptions, societal upbringing, and culture.
Our worldview isn’t better or worse than others, just different. With these differences comes a certain degree of egocentricity.
I used to spend hours thinking about how I may have hurt someone’s feelings or scolding myself for something that I have absolutely no control over.
The reality is, that no one thinks more about your problems than you do.
When you realize this, then you can allow yourself the ability to stop caring about them too.
In some respects, you are also kind of invisible to others. Do you recall dressing up for Halloween? There is a certain type of anonymity with wearing a mask. Your problems are masked to others and mean little because we are all just trying to get by.
In closing, well-being is a kind of hidden skill we all can possess. It’s not like learning how to perfect the nunchucks or anything super complicated like that.
Instead, it’s like learning how to brush your teeth. Just a little bit of repetition daily.
I don’t have all the answers on how to show you to be well, although I have some ideas. However, the instructions are within you, like some Ikea directions, but with a few more tools.
You just have to get out of your own way and enjoy the trip we’ve been given.
Make mistakes. Fall. Get up. Fall again. Get up again. Love. Break your heart. Love again. Cry your heart out when someone you love leaves and laugh.
Laugh like your life depends on it.
It really does.
There are no rules. No need to take anything too seriously for too long.
Free your mind from yourself and let your life, live.
With love,
Anand
I write articles, stories, and poetry on well-being. Subscribe below to get on my free newsletter so my work can be delivered directly to your inbox. Thank you for visiting.
Amand,
I continue to read & share your writings. Thanks.
I couldn’t help but notice you are in Oregon. Salem was our home for 20 years. If you wander up to Salem would you stop to walk the Riverfront Park. You will find a beautiful carousel there & on the back side there is a bronze statue called The Angel of Hope. That was on my bucket list & w/my husband’s help we accomplished bringing it to That spot. Many people donated. It is a calm place for anyone who has lost a child to come & meditate & heal. I hope on your journey you will be able to work this in. In addition the Riverfront Park has a former train bridge that has been made into a walking bridge across the Willamette River. It is simply beautiful. Then there is another bridge that is a work of art that carries you over to Minto Brown Island that is nothing but a reserve for walking dogs & enjoying picking wild berries. Plus there is the huge EcoBall in the park which was at one time a ball container that held chemicals for the long gone paper mill. It was restore into a work of art via the local art association. If you are just wandering & haven’t discovered The park in Salem I do believe it will be well worth your stop.
Ginny
PS. The room air machine continues to impress us. Thank you. I do believe our lives cross for several reasons. 🤗
Ginny! Thanks so much for the beautiful words. When my wife and I head to Oregon in the Salem area, we may check this out. You never know why or how people come into your life, but in our one meeting, I could just sense beautiful energy about you. Thanks for subscribing, commenting, and showing so much support.